What is it about the past that has us so fascinated?
On Facebook we are fascinated and amused, for a short while at least- especially with the pictures. This place allows one to be a social voyeur, peering at pictures of those we knew or sometimes thought we might have considered 'getting to know' - but way back then.
Reality hits home and quickly. Those people are just not adding up to how we see them in our memory mind's eye. They have become older, mundane and far less fascinating. In short, (I) we have become, dare I say it, -'normal' in our middle to upper middle age. Many of us are down right boring compared to the Shakespearian Midsummer night's Dream- like hyper sexual selves we flaunted from the Age of Aquarius. (Steve Poirier is now saying -"Speak for yourself".) But those inner fantasy projections were worn by youthful beings striving and rebelling to emerge from a chrysalis childhood to a new world of awareness yet having to wear school uniform and keep hair short.
So therein lies the rub! The real nostalgia is about who we once were and not who we are now. It is perhaps about who we wanted to be and how we wanted to be seen.
I guess this is why a reunion is most effective perhaps every ten years or so and not every two or three. At age 16, fundamental change occurs every two weeks or so while at age 45 and onward change is somewhat less sought after. (I am a rock, I am an island -and an island never cries.)
The memories are golden or horrific depending upon the reality that we sprang from. And there is no going back. That is the value of memory. (All That Rises Must Converge.)
Greeting/'poking' people with ditty Facebook comments replaces taking a walk in the Chateauguay Shopping Centre ('mall' nowadays) or strolling down the hall back in Billings-mode, familiar faces passing by. But if they were never really your friends or even acquaintances, you're not about to invite them home right? One can nod and just keep on going. Actually not so with Facebook, depending on how you set it up, your family life and pictures and real friends are now open to others to gawk (or steal pictures without asking) whether you like it or not.
Hmmmm time to adjust my FB settings.
To remember in a moment of nostalgia is one thing. To meet up with those who never really had anything in common(in cyberspace), is something else indeed. ('Un Nouveau Monde', mais faux!) It distracts from the activities in life that we really value - that is, if one has a life with valued activities.
But then my real friends communicate by phone or direct e-mail or yes!- even hand written mail which still contains it's archaic charm.
1 comment:
I enjoyed reading this blog Les. I too am fascinated by the past and amazed that I can remember so much of it. In a way it's unfortunate that I grew up in a high school with over 2000 students. Although there were many faces I recognized in the halls (and in your posted pictures), there were few that became friends. Those few remain friends to this day. A lot of us, like yourself, moved away but some of us never returned. I am looking forward to the next reunion and hope to be able to add more "friends" to FB.
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